Tuesday, 7 May 2013


So there's this Blog Every Day in May thing going around Blogland right now.  I'm not fully participating in it, but when I like the prompt, I figure I might as well go with it.  So today's prompt was to write about what you are afraid of.

I'm terrified that Ryan will die.  I'm not sure if this is completely irrational or not.  As soon as we got married, I started worrying about his health, and what he eats (not that he has changed his eating habits), and whether he's going to have a heart attack when he's 50.  Or he could die in a car accident tomorrow.  Or when he goes away for weekends with the boys he might drown. 

Saturday night I woke up crying because I had a dream that he died.  That's intense.  This isn't a weekly dream or anything, but it is something that reoccurs from time to time.  I guess I just don't know what I would do without him.  I can function on my own, but I don't really want to.  Does anybody else have this fear?  



  1. Maw Maw Estelle7 May 2013 at 05:28

    I always had/have the same fears...and wait it gets worse, once you have children you have the same fears about them x how ever many kids you have. I guess when we love something so much we just worry and are fearful about losing them.

  2. Yep, I absolutely have this fear. I just can't imagine what I would do. The weird thing is that I start to think about really trivial/practical things, like what would I do about his truck, or other things like that. I mean, that would be the least of my worries if anything actually happened!